[NEohioPAL]Mike and Ike Review the Toronto production of Evil Dead-The Musical

[Jeff Holland]

WARNING:  IT’S TIME

Mike: (English accent) Greetings and salutations. 
He’s not Mike.

Ike: (Southern accent) He ain’t Ike.  Here’s the deal,
misfit toys, the Toronto Evil Dead video IS comin’! 
We been havin’ some technical difficulties.

M:  You said you knew how to edit.

I:  I ain’t used ta this program!

M:  You’re an idiot.

I:  And you smell like a mummy’s vagina stuffed with
rancid bacon, but that ain’t important right now.  The
important thing is that you will see some of the cast,
the writer, some fans, Dan the Man, and most
importantly, us this week-end.

M:  Unless he screws up again, in which case the next
review will be written by myself and Bob the
Indonesian prostitute.

I:  Oh, you’re still talkin’ ta him?

M:  Well, he’s a much better conversationalist.

SHORT PAUSE

I:  Douchebag.

M:  And he lets me pitch.

I:  What?

M:  Nothing.  Anyway, we’re still suffering the
psychological damage inflicted from watching High
School Musical 2.

I:  Or as I like ta call it, “The Death of All Light
and Life.”

M:  So instead of therapy or drugs—

I:  Legal ones.

M:  --we’re going to talk about something that makes
us happy.

I:  In our review of the New York production of Evil
Dead-The Musical, I stated that it was THE GREATEST
PIECE OF ENTERTAINMENT IN THE HISTORY OF HISTORY
PERIOD.  I was wrong.  It is the second greatest.  The
Toronto production is officially THE GREATEST PIECE OF
ENTERTAINMENT IN THE HISTORY OF HISTORY PERIOD.

M:  It was like I was seeing the show for the first
time.

I:  I can’t believe they actually made the show
better, but they did.

M:  Do you think the people next to us got annoyed by
our singing along?

I:  Do you think I care?

M:  It was the little things that improved the show so
much.  A new look, a new line delivery, a new piece of
action; all these things added up to make Evil
Dead-The Musical officially “The Show that Broadway
Didn’t Deserve.”

I:  And Matt Olmstead frakkin’ rocks as Scotty.  We
been talkin’ ta him online for almost a year now and
it was just so damn cool ta see him onstage.  And wait
till ya hear his explanation for the costume change
when he turns inta the Deadite Fearless leader.  It’s
great.

M:  Ryan Ward has gotten even Ashier, if that’s
possible.

I:  The whole damn cast rocks, but I gotta give
special props ta Mike “Nug” Nahrgang, who plays Jake. 
Not only do I love the name “Nug” but his performance
in Ode to an Accidental Stabbing is just comic genius.

M:  The show runs until September 8th and, sadly, this
time it must close.

I:  So, dear friends, go see it.  They haven’t closed
the borders yet, so it’s still pretty easy to get
across.  Go to EvilDeadTheMusical.com and get tickets,
just do it.  Some of ya got tickets for the New York
run cause of what we were sayin’ before we even saw
it.  Well, we seen it twice now and I will all cap one
more time.  It is the GREATEST PIECE OF ENTERTAINMENT
IN THE HISTORY OF HISTORY PERIOD and needs ta be seen
by everybody who’s a higher life form.  Trust us. 
Spend the money.

M:  Speaking of higher life forms, we would like to
officially welcome Derek Fast into the club.  He’s the
PR man for the show and he is a great man.

I:  We also want ta thank Dan The Man (You’ll meet him
on the video), the fans we talked ta, Ryan, Matt, Nug,
and George Reinblatt for bein’ in the video.  You are
all also higher life forms.

M:  You will see the video, and us, this week-end.

I:  Namaste.



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