[NEohioPAL] Berko review: DEBBIE DOES DALLAS @ Blank Canvas

[Roy Berko]

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 *DEBBIE DOES DALLAS, not for prudes at Blank Canvas*

Roy Berko

(Member, American Theatre Critics Association, Cleveland Critics Circle)

What does an airheaded, “good” girl from Beaverton Jesuit High School do
when she wants to be a Dallas Cowgirl professional football team
cheerleader, and she gets accepted, but doesn’t have the money to get from
Oklahoma to the big city?  She and her cheerleading friends, of course,
turn to prostitution.  That, at least is the premise of the classic porn
flick DEBBIE DOES DALLAS, as well as the musical based on that flick.  The
latter is now on stage at Blank Canvas.

DEBBIE DOES DALLAS is a 1978 porno film which starred the infamous Bambi
Woods, she of well endowed mammary glands and long blonde hair. The flick
was one of the most important releases during the “Golden Age of Porn,” and
remains one of the best-known films of that genre.

Ironically, Woods tried out for the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, in real
life, but was cut during auditions.

Starting at the New York Fringe Festival, the musical, which has a book by
Susan Schwartz and music by Andrew Sherman, Tom Kitt and Jonathan
Callicutt, was optioned by Araca, the New York producing firm headed by
Clevelanders Mathew and Michael Rego and Hank Unger.  The trio also
produced URINETOWN, THE MUSICAL, WICKED, FRANKIE AND JOHNNY IN THE CLAIRE
de LUNE, and ROCK OF AGES.

DEBBIE opened off-Broadway in 2002, became a cult hit, and has been
produced in Australia, San Francisco and Los Angeles.

In the musical, we find Debbie Benton yearning to fulfill her life-long
dream of wearing the white and blue star and fringe covered brief uniform
of her beloved Cowgirls.  Debbie enlists her cheermates to get jobs to help
her get enough money to go to Dallas.  But, of course, with a two-week
deadline, and only minimum wage jobs available, they are quickly frustrated.
Debbie’s boss, Mr. Greenfelt, advises her and the other girls to transfer
their Teen Services “business” into a “sex for hire” operation.  As happens
in all good porn flicks, the girls hit the jackpot!

For the pure at heart, as is common with productions of this show, there is
no actual sex or full nudity.  Well…there is enough suggestion that the
opening night audience, mostly twenty-somethings, whooped and hollered
during the towels-only locker room scene, male flashing, the several
simulations of oral sex, the female-on-female clothes on orgy, female
frontal penetration with a banana, a wet t-shirt car wash, the horny
football players attempts at teenage groping…okay, there is enough going on
that the Romney/Ryan folk headed for the doors about fifteen minutes into
the 90-minute intermissionless show.

Wisely, director Pat Ciamacco has the cast playing real, rather than
broadly over acting.  This technique makes the obvious story line, with its
sexual innuendoes, properly ridiculous.  No, this is not Shakespeare or
Noel Coward, but low farce, intended to offend the purist, and delight the
lecherous.

Musical Director Lawrence Wallace and his band play well, but the music,
like the script, is not meant to be great.  Come on, the quickly
forgettable songs have such titles as *Bring It*, *Pep Rally*, *The Locker
Room Orgy*, *Ten Dollars Closer*, *God Must Love a Fool*, and *Dallas…I’m
Coming* (and, yes, that’s sung in a high pitched vocal frenzy!).  This is
not the likes of *I Am What I Am*, *What I Did for Love*, or *We Go Together
*.  Though the intent may be somewhat the same, the effect is different.

Leslie Andrews looks and sounds like the air-headed “good” girl Debbie.  She
has a nice singing voice and the right vacant look.  Tasha Brandt is slut
right as Lisa.  Ashley Conlon is fine as the geeky, uptight Tammy. Becca
Frick is right on track as Roberta, the blonde bimbo, and Jordan Renee
Malin does justice to the role of Donna.  Doug Bailey, Pat Miller and Bill
Reichert, in and out of their clothes,  play all of their multi-roles as
hormone hopping football jocks and the men in the lives of the
cheerleaders, with the right farcical air and mustaches falling off, to the
delight of the viewers.

The production lags due to long set and costume changes, and languid
pacing, but the overall effect, at least judged by the opening night
audience, is positive.

*CAPSULE JUDGMENT:  DEBBIE DOES DALLAS is the kind of show that will
entertain some, irritate others, titillate some, offend others.  The
script, the production, and the concept has all the makings of a cult
musical (think—THE ROCKY HORROR SHOW), mainly aimed at a young, hip
audience.*

DEBBIE DOES DALLAS runs though December 22 in its west side theatre, 1305
West 78th Street, Suite 211, Cleveland.  Get directions to the theatre on
the website.  (My GPS was of little help).  Once you arrive at the site, go
around the first building to find the entrance and then follow the signs to
the second floor acting space.  It’s an adventurous battle. For tickets and
directions go to *www.blankcanvasthetre.com*

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